The Easiest Hack I Found In Making Self-Help Easier

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Self-help was very hard until I found the secret formula, and it’s SO easy!

Key Points of Article:

  1. A backstory to back up my claim.
  2. It’s about knowing how you work!
  3. Simply add, never restrict.

Freedom doesnt mean the absence of all restrictions.

Daisaku Ikeda 1

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Backstory:

  • In 2020, I was 320lbs because I had created the belief that I lacked food.
  • This mindset came from my childhood when I had to face a lack of needs.
  • I felt like I had a lack of food growing up because sometimes I would see that I got food when other family members didn’t. Other small things that I would notice growing up led me to this belief of lack.
  • Absolutely no hate, I had to do what I had to do to and I’m grateful to have experienced my lack of food because it got me here, helping you.
  • However, as I aged and my resources grew abundant, that initial belief system that I would never have enough and would always have to restrict things stayed.

Then, other things happened in my life that concreted this belief that I never had enough and I’ll always have to restrict myself.

  1. Being restricted from money
  2. Restricted from romantic attention
  3. Being restricted from happiness
  4. Being restricted from friend groups

So forth…

Then, when I started my self-help journey and started to dig into these beliefs and I found something interesting…

  • I had been trying to help myself lose weight, by restricting myself from everything that I had been eating daily for 20 years.
  • Trying to help myself eat healthier, by restricting entire food groups or food as a whole and just starving!
  • I had been trying to help myself feel better, by restricting the food that I craved!

My innate response to changing how I was restricting myself… was restricting myself in my self-help journey.

See where I had a problem?

  • So, I decided to look into what would happen if I stopped restricting myself from beliefs and actions I’ve grown habitually to do, and instead focused on what I could add to my habits to help myself feel best!
  • Then, I found the best hack to make self-help easier!

Simply Add, Never Restrict!

  • By simply adding new things into your self-help journey that are in alignment with your goal, you’ll reach success in helping yourself easier and faster!

But… How?

  • When you begin to improve an idea or situation, the brain gets fired up looking for possible changes that can occur. When you begin to restrict things from your life, your brain will come up with the best possible solutions to fill that hole. 2
  • However, the brain also is tricky because when a habit has already been established, like my restricting food habits, the brain pathways got stronger EVERY TIME I was restricting myself. The brain learns to do exactly what it needs to do so that your habit can continue going. 3
  • This means, that your brain doesn’t want to change and will think of solutions around not changing.

Your brain doesn’t want to change.

  • And it will throw a fit when you try. The result is the brain trying to change a belief in emotions of stress, anger, and intense feelings of resistance. 4

But the self-help hack is that the brain LOVES adding stuff into your life!

  • While the brain may not like restricting or it meets with restriction, it loves addition!
  • When you add something to your existing habit, the brain’s rewarding stimuli and dopamine system are activated. 5
  • Simply put, the brain begins to see this addition as a great thing and begins craving the new addition.

Then, I started adding things into my self-help practice, instead of restricting… and it worked!

Examples:

  1. I stopped restricting myself from what I had been eating daily and added a single vegetable to 1 meal a day. The result? I started craving vegetables and now eat more of them than anything else for each meal!
  2. I stopped restricting myself from entire food groups and starving myself and added other food groups I hadn’t tried before. The result? Turns out I LOVE Kiwi and exotic fruits!
  3. I stopped restricting the food that I craved, EX: soda, and added water WITH my soda. The result? I now drink water daily and crave it!

The result of adding and not restricting is it helped me get better.

As of writing this post, due to this method alone, I’ve helped myself heal from Major Depressive Disorder by adding in fun mental activities, lost 96 pounds naturally by the examples above, and completely broke the restricting cycle.

  • You can do it too! I know because I did it.

What do you think? I’d love to know in the comments below!

Do you want more of our self-help resources? Find more above in the search of Rosabethmooon.com 🙂

Worksheet!

I’ll always attach a worksheet that goes alongside the article for FREE! Simply download the image onto your device, and either print or write and save as PDF!

Works Cited:

  1. “Daisaku Ikeda.” Wikipedia, Wikimedia Foundation, 11 Feb. 2024, en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daisaku_Ikeda. ↩︎
  2. Adams, G.S., Converse, B.A., Hales, A.H. et al. People systematically overlook subtractive changes. Nature 592, 258–261 (2021). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41586-021-03380-y ↩︎
  3. Soph Dr. . “Why It Is So Hard To Change – The Neuroscience Made Simple.” Drsoph.Com, 9 Jul. 2019, drsoph.com/blog/2018/7/6/why-it-is-so-hard-to-change-the-neuroscience-madesimple. ↩︎
  4. Soph Dr. . “Why It Is So Hard To Change – The Neuroscience Made Simple.” Drsoph.Com, 9 Jul. 2019, drsoph.com/blog/2018/7/6/why-it-is-so-hard-to-change-the-neuroscience-madesimple. ↩︎
  5. Lewis, Robert G., et al. “The Brain’S Reward System in Health and Disease.” PMC PubMed Central, Adv Exp Med Biol., no. PMCID: PMC8992377, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-81147-1_4. ↩︎

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